Before we start this story, i'd like to dedicate this story to Amanda Sargent, Vaidehi Limaye and Charumathi. They provided the inspiration i needed for this story by way of their deep and meaningful insights. Hats off to you ladies! Now, without much ado, let's...
The sky was blue, the coast was looking azure, and along the much famed and much abused surf of Bombay called the Marine Drive, love seemed to be blossoming in the air. It was spring and the trees growing alongside the coast were in full bloom, their gaudy pink flowers throwing out a heady perfume that made the setting even more romantic :)
Shankar too was one of those lovey dovey couples dotting the surf, only enjoying the presence of his beloved! Shankar had been dating Shalu for over a year now, and in this wobbly, unstable world of emotions, adrenaline and hormones, they'd been doing pretty good. Shankar was lost in his little romantic cocoon, content to remain in the warm glow of an embrace with his beloved Shalu.
Time seemed to be flying by in addition to a few squawking seagulls and the ever present crows along the coastline. Nobody seemed to care, but this couple couldn't give a damn either! They were content among themselves...
And then the whole picture seemed to burst apart at the seams! Images began to distort and explode into just flashes of colour and light, the surf seemed to rip itself apart and everywhere around them, it was the same. A riot of colours, people, buildings, the whole world was denegenerating into a riot of colours, and then a flash of bright light...
Shankar woke up sweating and palpitating, his heart was pounding so hard in its rib cage it almost seemed to be ready to explode! Shocked, disarrayed and disturbed, Shankar rubbed his eyes to adjust his vision to the dimly lit kholi's environs. The fever dream had come to an end. And that was something Shankar didn't like...
The environs, the setting and Shalu, it was only too idyllic a setting, only too fantastic to be true. Shalu was engaged to be married, but not with Shankar. Shankar and Shalu had parted ways after a year of togetherness for "reasons". Be it Shalu's abusive nature or Shankar's constant absence, we never know what dealt the coup de grace, but this "lovey dovey" couple had parted ways, in ways not too soft and sweet.
Back at BDD Chawl 10, kholi number 110, Savitabai was only too happy to see her son returned to "normalcy". Of course, what Shankar was going through, nobody ever knew, none except Chunnilal, aka Chandu, aka Dedh Shanya! But we'll come to them later, Savitabai's offering tea now!
Savitabai was Shankar's mother, and as would any normal mother be, concerned about Shankar's love life. She was a strict and traditional Maharashtrian when it came to moral code, but was willing to accept Shankar's "would be wife", if he brought a good girl home! Alas, Shalu wasn't quite Savitabai's idea of a good homely girl. Shalu too was Maharashtrian and came from somewhat similar backgrounds. Her father and Shankar's father worked together at the BMC, but Shalu had come only a year back, after her graduation studies from Pune.
Cutting a long story short, Savitabai thought Shalu was far too aggressive for a girl, and quite rightly if you ask me! Shalu was a very dedicated lover, and could mother Shankar through the worst of his nightmares, if only she'd be a little more docile and gentle. Shalu had a terrible whiplash like tongue, and she used it freely. sometimes it felt to have a sharp steel blade running right through the heart, instead of hearing Shalu scream and bitch!
This combined with Savitabai's constant nagging about Shalu, Shalu's parents forcing Shankar to a decision, and Shalu's whiplash tongue was a potent and deadly combination that could drive the best of men insane! Indeed, Shankar was in a state of turmoil and indecision...
Back at the kholi, not kholi number 110, but a dark and dingy one in shadiest areas of the city, this was a place near Bombay Central. A left turn from Bhindi Bazaar led into a series of streets named after a certain Dr.Foras. But this place was better known by another name, Kamathipura. A veritable city within the city, kholi after kholi brimmed with loose women, or women forced by circumstance to make the vulva available to any Tom, Dick or Harry or any other fucker for a price. This was the infamous "Street of a thousand whores", "Rand Bazaar" in Hindi, the famous "City of mortal delights" if a philosopher could term it.
But Shankar came her not for satisfying his libido's thirst, he sought a different pleasure, something far worse and far more addictive, damaging one for that matter. There are chemicals, there are compounds, some are natural, others manufactured but they all serve the same purpose. For a handful of rupees, you could buy freedom from reality and escape into the world of dreams and illusions...
Shankar found it cheap although the compound was an expensive derivative of poppy, the market name for it was heroin. Hard core druggies dreaded the sound of the word, and others you needn't even ask. Only the damned came here for heroin, only those who wanted to live in their dreams, and die in a world of limbo, except that you didn't die until your body twisted and convoluted in misery and pain and mental torture, slowly. It killed you, one moment at a time...
The sound of the name Chandu or Chunnilal might make you think he was a scrawny pimp who offered relief in the form of narcotics as well, but Chandu was a dreaded name out there in Kamathipura. He'd come to power after a sea of bloodshed, atleast that's what legend has it. His own brother had pitted against him, and Chandu finished him off with a knife, one body part at a time. Chandu hated guns, and he took out his victims with a knife, often leaving a survivor too mangled and distorted to rejoin the force against him, and also serve as a message to future would be "bhais"!
"Fuck off you mother fucking slugs and bastards, this is the MY world! And i'm no angel to finish you off painlessly and quickly if i find you to be on my wrong side!" was Chandu's watchword. And he did make sure his threats materialized. A bhai like this was feared even by the cops, specially when he looked into their eyes, with his one normal eye. The other had been gouged out by a huge scar which was the reminder of what a bear once did to him. What happened to the bear would make your guts turn, you get the point right??
Chandu ran a good number of brothels and a few of them had this hard drug heroin. Heroin was serious business, and had a few regular clientele. Of course, in a few months most of them would be found dead in a sewer or on the street drowned in their own blood or vomit. But the city had enough broken hearted souls and hardened hearts who chose to escape into the world of dreams, but for a moment's worth, to be at peace, to be with a family they could never have, to have a life they could never dream of in reality. Heroin kept them together for a miserable while, and once the effect wore off, it was time to inject again. So, you could have some dedicated clientele who'd live and perhaps even die in your little "cafe"!
It was three months since Shankar was into heroin, but then why would Shankar find solace in his dreams? Well, that was the only place he and Shalu could be together, forever. Of course subtract Shalu's evil tongue, Shankar's constant wandering, Savitabai, Shalu's parents, and the whole fucking world for that matter! They were together, as they'd been just a year ago, happy to be lost in each others arms.
It had been 3 hours since the last fix, and it was time to slip back into one. Life was far too empty to be lived, emptier than the eyes of a junkie who's lost his soul to heroin. And so, twisting and tying a length of rope around his forearm, Shankar constricted enough blood to make his veins visible, and also control the effect of the fix before the injection was completed. If you shot up before the fix was complete, you ended up wasting some good dream time, can't afford to do that can i? was Shankar's and every other such junkie's school of thought!
3 months ago Shankar and Shalu parted ways. Shalu wept bitterly and yet Shankar stood like a rock, almost unaffected by Shalu's pain. "I can't take it no longer Shalu, your vile tongue's worse than my mothers', and the prospect of facing you'll both together is something i cannot take! I'd rather break off from both of you'll and live by myself!"
"Can you live without me Shankar? Can you really live without my love Shankar? My parents will soon arrange a groom for me, and i'll survive somehow, but what about you?" Shalu asked almost piteously. It was hard to watch, even for me though i've seen things worse, a once loving couple breaking off is something even Time can't bear to watch.
And so, Shalu made her way home slowly, like a wounded animal limping off to its death. Indeed, Shalu was dead from within the moment Shankar spoke of the dreaded word "break-up". Before Shalu disappeared along one of life's curves, before she was out of sight, Shankar broke down in a weeping heap. He had no choice left with him. Shalu had been cruel on him, and so was his mother. They both loved him so much they could not see what they were doing to Shankar. And his once proudly beating heart sank into the depths of a depression, pumping only to live and nothing else!
The sky was blue, the coast was looking azure, and along the much famed and much abused surf of Bombay called the Marine Drive, love seemed to be blossoming in the air. It was spring and the trees growing alongside the coast were in full bloom, their gaudy pink flowers throwing out a heady perfume that made the setting even more romantic :)
Shankar too was one of those lovey dovey couples dotting the surf, only enjoying the presence of his beloved! Shankar had been dating Shalu for over a year now, and in this wobbly, unstable world of emotions, adrenaline and hormones, they'd been doing pretty good. Shankar was lost in his little romantic cocoon, content to remain in the warm glow of an embrace with his beloved Shalu.
Time seemed to be flying by in addition to a few squawking seagulls and the ever present crows along the coastline. Nobody seemed to care, but this couple couldn't give a damn either! They were content among themselves...
And then the whole picture seemed to burst apart at the seams! Images began to distort and explode into just flashes of colour and light, the surf seemed to rip itself apart and everywhere around them, it was the same. A riot of colours, people, buildings, the whole world was denegenerating into a riot of colours, and then a flash of bright light...
Shankar woke up sweating and palpitating, his heart was pounding so hard in its rib cage it almost seemed to be ready to explode! Shocked, disarrayed and disturbed, Shankar rubbed his eyes to adjust his vision to the dimly lit kholi's environs. The fever dream had come to an end. And that was something Shankar didn't like...
The environs, the setting and Shalu, it was only too idyllic a setting, only too fantastic to be true. Shalu was engaged to be married, but not with Shankar. Shankar and Shalu had parted ways after a year of togetherness for "reasons". Be it Shalu's abusive nature or Shankar's constant absence, we never know what dealt the coup de grace, but this "lovey dovey" couple had parted ways, in ways not too soft and sweet.
Back at BDD Chawl 10, kholi number 110, Savitabai was only too happy to see her son returned to "normalcy". Of course, what Shankar was going through, nobody ever knew, none except Chunnilal, aka Chandu, aka Dedh Shanya! But we'll come to them later, Savitabai's offering tea now!
Savitabai was Shankar's mother, and as would any normal mother be, concerned about Shankar's love life. She was a strict and traditional Maharashtrian when it came to moral code, but was willing to accept Shankar's "would be wife", if he brought a good girl home! Alas, Shalu wasn't quite Savitabai's idea of a good homely girl. Shalu too was Maharashtrian and came from somewhat similar backgrounds. Her father and Shankar's father worked together at the BMC, but Shalu had come only a year back, after her graduation studies from Pune.
Cutting a long story short, Savitabai thought Shalu was far too aggressive for a girl, and quite rightly if you ask me! Shalu was a very dedicated lover, and could mother Shankar through the worst of his nightmares, if only she'd be a little more docile and gentle. Shalu had a terrible whiplash like tongue, and she used it freely. sometimes it felt to have a sharp steel blade running right through the heart, instead of hearing Shalu scream and bitch!
This combined with Savitabai's constant nagging about Shalu, Shalu's parents forcing Shankar to a decision, and Shalu's whiplash tongue was a potent and deadly combination that could drive the best of men insane! Indeed, Shankar was in a state of turmoil and indecision...
Back at the kholi, not kholi number 110, but a dark and dingy one in shadiest areas of the city, this was a place near Bombay Central. A left turn from Bhindi Bazaar led into a series of streets named after a certain Dr.Foras. But this place was better known by another name, Kamathipura. A veritable city within the city, kholi after kholi brimmed with loose women, or women forced by circumstance to make the vulva available to any Tom, Dick or Harry or any other fucker for a price. This was the infamous "Street of a thousand whores", "Rand Bazaar" in Hindi, the famous "City of mortal delights" if a philosopher could term it.
But Shankar came her not for satisfying his libido's thirst, he sought a different pleasure, something far worse and far more addictive, damaging one for that matter. There are chemicals, there are compounds, some are natural, others manufactured but they all serve the same purpose. For a handful of rupees, you could buy freedom from reality and escape into the world of dreams and illusions...
Shankar found it cheap although the compound was an expensive derivative of poppy, the market name for it was heroin. Hard core druggies dreaded the sound of the word, and others you needn't even ask. Only the damned came here for heroin, only those who wanted to live in their dreams, and die in a world of limbo, except that you didn't die until your body twisted and convoluted in misery and pain and mental torture, slowly. It killed you, one moment at a time...
The sound of the name Chandu or Chunnilal might make you think he was a scrawny pimp who offered relief in the form of narcotics as well, but Chandu was a dreaded name out there in Kamathipura. He'd come to power after a sea of bloodshed, atleast that's what legend has it. His own brother had pitted against him, and Chandu finished him off with a knife, one body part at a time. Chandu hated guns, and he took out his victims with a knife, often leaving a survivor too mangled and distorted to rejoin the force against him, and also serve as a message to future would be "bhais"!
"Fuck off you mother fucking slugs and bastards, this is the MY world! And i'm no angel to finish you off painlessly and quickly if i find you to be on my wrong side!" was Chandu's watchword. And he did make sure his threats materialized. A bhai like this was feared even by the cops, specially when he looked into their eyes, with his one normal eye. The other had been gouged out by a huge scar which was the reminder of what a bear once did to him. What happened to the bear would make your guts turn, you get the point right??
Chandu ran a good number of brothels and a few of them had this hard drug heroin. Heroin was serious business, and had a few regular clientele. Of course, in a few months most of them would be found dead in a sewer or on the street drowned in their own blood or vomit. But the city had enough broken hearted souls and hardened hearts who chose to escape into the world of dreams, but for a moment's worth, to be at peace, to be with a family they could never have, to have a life they could never dream of in reality. Heroin kept them together for a miserable while, and once the effect wore off, it was time to inject again. So, you could have some dedicated clientele who'd live and perhaps even die in your little "cafe"!
It was three months since Shankar was into heroin, but then why would Shankar find solace in his dreams? Well, that was the only place he and Shalu could be together, forever. Of course subtract Shalu's evil tongue, Shankar's constant wandering, Savitabai, Shalu's parents, and the whole fucking world for that matter! They were together, as they'd been just a year ago, happy to be lost in each others arms.
It had been 3 hours since the last fix, and it was time to slip back into one. Life was far too empty to be lived, emptier than the eyes of a junkie who's lost his soul to heroin. And so, twisting and tying a length of rope around his forearm, Shankar constricted enough blood to make his veins visible, and also control the effect of the fix before the injection was completed. If you shot up before the fix was complete, you ended up wasting some good dream time, can't afford to do that can i? was Shankar's and every other such junkie's school of thought!
3 months ago Shankar and Shalu parted ways. Shalu wept bitterly and yet Shankar stood like a rock, almost unaffected by Shalu's pain. "I can't take it no longer Shalu, your vile tongue's worse than my mothers', and the prospect of facing you'll both together is something i cannot take! I'd rather break off from both of you'll and live by myself!"
"Can you live without me Shankar? Can you really live without my love Shankar? My parents will soon arrange a groom for me, and i'll survive somehow, but what about you?" Shalu asked almost piteously. It was hard to watch, even for me though i've seen things worse, a once loving couple breaking off is something even Time can't bear to watch.
And so, Shalu made her way home slowly, like a wounded animal limping off to its death. Indeed, Shalu was dead from within the moment Shankar spoke of the dreaded word "break-up". Before Shalu disappeared along one of life's curves, before she was out of sight, Shankar broke down in a weeping heap. He had no choice left with him. Shalu had been cruel on him, and so was his mother. They both loved him so much they could not see what they were doing to Shankar. And his once proudly beating heart sank into the depths of a depression, pumping only to live and nothing else!
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